{choose a chair to sit… and listen}
Is the question that is going through my mind for the last hours.
Maybe due to my academic education, I often wonder about people’s different ways of thinking… acting… reacting… of being. We are all different from each other, not necessarily better or worse, just different.
But how often do we judge others because they act differently from us? I already wrote something about differences among people, and how those differences should and must be respected. We’re not all the same, we don’t grow among the same family, friends, teachers, cities… societies. Therefore, we are different from each other…final point. We have and must respect each other.
And among friends…? Are there rules? I guess there are. Even so, these rules can be quite different from friend to friend. We can have different rules for this special and close friend that lives next to us, works with us, and have different rules for another friend, very close, but that lives away from us… which makes the contact different.
However these are, frequently, silent rules. We don’t begin a friendship by writing rules down… we create them through the days, weeks, months, years… experiences that we have with that person. Nevertheless, there are changes in our lives, that lead us to some smooth differences in our rules… maybe we’re not always available, maybe we start to also enjoy other things, besides the other ones we already enjoyed, maybe we start to care about doing just those things that make us feel so happy… and nevertheless, there’s sometimes someone that makes you feel bad, because you’ve changed.
But that’s not quite the point I would like to make… I would like to make a different point… if we do those things that make us happy (and sometimes these things are not with our friends), if we don’t hurt no one, if we don’t let our friends alone waiting for support or that special word, if we just say no to something because we hate to do it, even a trivial thing… even if we said we would… is that being selfish? Or just you? Is that really important? Or just a moment among your days? Is that a bad thing? Or being bad is much worse than this?
When are we being selfish?
Maybe sometimes we do have to do things that we’re not really fond of, just because it’s important for our friends… even the smallest thing.
Maybe that’s when we know we’re being selfish…
And then? Then you talk to your friend, explain, say that you’re sorry and promise to make up for her/him in a next time.
We’re not perfect. And we shouldn’t try to be perfect. And we shouldn’t expect anyone to be perfect, not let anyone to expect that from us. We must be loved with our flaws. How much flaws is too much? Well, that’ll be for a next post.
we.re.not.perfect.we.must.follow.our.footsteps.allowing.us.to.be.imperfect.
ivy style33 says
DEar Twiggs,
I have no answers, as each one of us should find our answers by ourselves and according to our personal critiria.
But I have a statement to make and this is that I trully like this last picture, capturing the moment.
I also love it as a composition, for its contradiction between the softness of the fabrics of your clothes and the steal flooring and stairs. Still, there is a tiny detail that binds them together, which amazes me: the metal detalis of your flat shoes :)
Worry not about uncomfortable changes dear…these shall give their place to more pleasant ones, as so is the circle of life.
Enjoy free of guilt anything that brings you true pleasure!
Twiggs says
Oh my dear, you always amaze me with your comments and observation skills!I adored how you described my last image. I also thought it was pretty adequate for the message I wanted to give.
Don't worry not my friend about giving answers, so that is not the point here, but to share thoughts about one of my main "objects" of interest – people.
I was delighted to know that you became a follower of my shy blog… once private :) Thank you my dear!
I hope you had a wonderful weekend!
ivy style33 says
…delightful not…but blessed with some beautiful, delightful moments…just saw your comment in my blog post about photography, Wiesbaden and thoughts on Greece…thank you :)
I shall write there soon, too.
Have a great day!
ivy style33 says
Hello dear,
wishes for a nice day :)
Thank you for reading and commenting on my post about photography, Wiesbaden and thoughts on Greece.
I shall reply there soon, too.
As for the weekend, it did have some delightful moments, as it did have ones that were not exactly blissfull…so is life…and coexistence is not always perfect.
Still, nice it its total. Hope the same for you :)